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If you have mixed feelings about your past or current sex life, do your best to come to terms with that before you talk to your daughter.Your best intentions will fall flat if you come across as upset, afraid, or downright angry when you talk about sex.Make Your Values Clear, Then Listen to Her You might want your daughter to wait until she’s married.You might think sex is OK after a certain age, or in the context of a loving, committed relationship.
“If they see their parent getting upset, they’ll clam up.” While fear and anxiety can make some moms go overboard, it prevents others from saying enough. “The kids would talk about who was hooking up with who,” she says. “Whenever we ask kids where they get their information about sex, teens always say their #1 source is their mothers.” The problem is, you probably won’t find the perfect time to talk about it. Ignore the Rolling Eyes and Talk to Her “The first thing mothers need to know is that they are a critical voice in their daughters’ sex education,” says Leslie Kantor, MPH, national director of education at Planned Parenthood Federation of America.“Parents play an important role in conveying their values,” says Kantor.But before you tell your daughter exactly what she can or can’t do, understand there’s only so much you can control.