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I knew enough about sexually transmitted diseases to know that I had herpes, but I didn't know exactly what to do.As I sat in the college health center waiting to see a doctor, I watched my very short-lived social life drift by.I met dozens of electronic pen pals and eventually went on several dates.It was a relief not to worry about when to bring up my medical history, and to bond with a guy over asymptomatic shedding instead of having to explain it.My friend said I was too much like a sister, and he couldn't continue. I worried about how that incident would affect our friendship.Little did I know my worries would extend far beyond that concern.Since he was disease-free, he refused to wear condoms, instead choosing the scrub-down -- something that would do nothing to prevent herpes transmission.

It was as if I had just re-entered mainstream society.I was still uncomfortable about bringing up the subject, but now I didn't have much of a choice.I didn't date for awhile, but inevitably, I met someone.Each time I had an outbreak, which for me consisted of a very small cluster of blisters that lasted two or three days, I'd pretend I had a yeast infection and say I couldn't have sex until it was gone.By the time I finished college in 1994, the possibility of spreading the virus even when you didn't have an outbreak had become more widely accepted by health care providers.

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